When I had to see the Social Worker, I was told that my son had already been taken away from the hospital and was being found a home. He would stay there and that would be his new family. I wasn't told I had 30 days in which to change my mind. My step father's attitude suddenly changed and he decided that he would help. He said that if I wanted to bring my baby home, he would help and support the decision, but mum being the boss of the family, said No!! and that was that, I was told to forget everything and get on with my life.

The last thing I received from the social worker was a photograph of my son when he was 10 months old. I had to hide everything that had happened, I went back to school and I had to tell everyone that I had food poisoning, that's what mum said in her letter to the school.

Rob and I eventually married and we had five more children. However this marriage did not last and I soon had had enough of Rob playing around with lots of other women. The only reason we stayed together was because of the children. I suddenly thought there has got to be a better life than this. Rob and I agreed that this was the end. After a few other things happened my children and I moved to Orange.

I kept this secret for many years. It wasn't until I moved to Orange NSW that things started to change for me. I was speaking to a girl friend on the phone, she brought up the subject about how she remembered that I was off school and said she really knew what had happened and that we should talk about this especially since we were so close.

She encouraged me to get in touch with a group who helped people involved in support for people hurt by adoption. I wrote to PARC and they sent me as much information as possible, but since my son was not 18 yet I couldn't do anything. So I waited.

I met many new friends, and then one day this guy I had never seen before knocked on my door. It was the first time in many years that another guy had asked me out. I said yes. One thing led to another and before long I and some of my children moved in to his home. This started a brand new life for me. Stuart was the best thing that could have happened to me. It was very strange and took a lot of getting used to.

I had found someone who cared, loved and accepted me for what I am. It was in August 1995, I received a letter to attend a weekend seminar at PARC, this was for birthmothers only. I met many other women who had been through what I had been through and understood how I feel. We were all the same yet somehow different in circumstances.

Early 1996 brought Stuart and myself down to Hobart. It was a big change, but it was for the best. I was reading the paper one day and decided that I should join a group. I went along to this meeting it was an Adoption Jigsaw meeting, and thought, well there are women down here like me as well. There wasn't a lot happening at this meeting, but I found other ladies who had similar experiences to me and also adoptees.

I met many different ladies, and now we keep in touch through Origins and personally as well. (I didn't continue with Adoption Jigsaw, because I found that the Origins Meetings were open and friendly and full of information and I felt comfortable going to them. Origins has helped build my confidence back up again to the stage that after many many years, I have succeeded in finding employment.

On the 9th of July, my son turned 18. I applied for his amended certificate and then played the waiting game. It didn't take very long, Stuart helped me write a letter to his adoptive parents as their name and previous address was on the certificate. The letter came back, they no longer lived there. We eventually found there names in the Electoral Rolls, it just seemed to be too easy. His father is an electrician, we found his name and phone number in the phone book.

This was just too easy. I was too nervous to ring, so Stuart acted as mediator for me and rang his parents when I was least expecting it. Since then, Scott's parents have sent me photos, letters and Scott gave me the best Christmas present anyone could ever have given me...... A phone call, we spoke for half an hour, we even discussed how smelly his feet were. I have had one more phone call since then, and Stuart and I are now organising a trip to meet him on the mainland.

I met with Scott in July 1997. Stuart, had organised the best birthday present ever. He paid for Scott to come and visit me in Hobart. His adoptive parents came to, so it was really a reunion that was ment to be. They have always known that one day, I would contact them and want to find out about Scott, so they were really prepared. They gave me a photo album, absolutely full of photos of Scott growing up.

It is now March the 17th 1999, and I am in contact with Scott at least twice a week, and we are planning to get together for his 21st this July. So far everything is working out well